The sun machine is comming down

All this talk of time
Delusions of the mind
YOU CAN'T! GIVE IN! LET GO!
What can I expect of myself, the one who has been brought into this "orderly" chaos
With the truth in grained in my brain, imagination too great for the thinking's of the swine
They must be wrong
But we are so few, it is I who must be crazy
I who should be locked away in a tower above all this
Lost time, lazzors, demons and rabbit holes.
All more appealing than what is right in front of us
YOU KNOW THE TRUTH!
so much confusion, so many memories
I had a dream, in it I was awake, when i came back I was asleep.
It is all unraveling with us in it
SO BE PART OF IT!
STOP FIGHTING
CHANGE
AWAKEN
It is now that we start!
Now that we come together!
Right now YOU must BEGIN.
No more watching!
No more waiting!
No more playing!
Now we CHANGE!
Now we must fight for that ultimate truth!!!

Only truth I know.

I am me
You are you
Who are we?
We are we
We will
We be
We feel
We see
We choose to be

How I wish I was not me

This pain between my heart and stomach never seems to disappear.

It is less apparent when I am in your arms.

But as soon as I am alone and I have time to think it's like a spear.

Thrown from my head down through my heart and lodging itself in my guts.

It would all be so much easier if I could just forget, not her, not you, nothing but me.

I wish I could forget all about me and how I fuck everything up.

I wish I could forget how I can never do anything how I can never say what is needed.

Oh how life would be if I weren't me.

With no feeling of responsibility over all these blind little clones.

With the ability to cry and hate and love without feeling guilty.

I have you now and this is all that matters, or at least thats what I know.

But I still feel like I cannot be happy until everyone is.

You, them, even her.

You are more than I deserve but I just don't know HOW to feel.

When nothing is forever how can I forget that we are not either.

I just want to be able to live, love and forget.

Forget about the instability of life, the transient nature of love and the knowledge that even forgetting is only temporary.

Oh, how I wish I was not me.

A Time For Change Is At Hand

Time for all to wake up and smell those "roses in your dream"
Do you smell it?
That is the shitty smell of reality!

Now WE must make this reality ours
Know that WE must plant the seeds and turn this pile of shit into a garden of roses.

A circle of white knights shall sit once more
Dragons and Tyrants will fall to the floor
And on the towers of change stand our powers
Let it be known, Camelot comes!

Very old, new Love.

I love you like no other and have always felt you were there you have gotten me through so much but now all I ask is for you to help me get through this along with all those I love.

When We Must Know Nothing Yet We Want To Know Everything

There is no longer right or wrong

Tomorrow north could mean south

Love means both life and death

And hate can't even be mustered

Up close a guiding star is just a fiery mass

All I want to know is to whom do I answer yes?


Everything must be done yet what can one do when everything is at the same time nothing. Love and life mean everything to me but now............ how can I know?

Questioning sanity?

When one sees that the ground work does not support the structure what does one do?
One can't simply tear it down and start again because the structure is in use.